Dedication: This work is sincerely dedicated to the DRUIDS (Department of the Reality Undermining of the Income Tax Department Sinisterly) for their great work in avoidance of recognition of this project.

Introduction

While it was once thought that questions now understood as simplistic when viewed from perpendicular perspectives such as "How high is up" and "How deep is down" were meaningless and obtuse, these very examples have succumbed to the robust puissantance of the precisions of Perpendicular penchants. Thus creating a vacuum in the pseudosphere of hyperspatial logistics of antimath. As noted by Dr. Val Macy PL.D in his insightful work: A Theory to Explain the Groorg Phenomenon (1996) the resultant instability requires that the issue be approached parenthetically through perpendicularity utilizing the pseudo-psychological theologism of the Plank Phenomenon (This is the neoscientific proof text demonstrating that one can avoid breaking their mother's back by walking on planks across the cracks in side walks and it's corellary that steping on the same plank when it is only partially on the sidewalk and hanging off the curb is correlated with nasal pain (r=0.9999, df = 0 P<.00000! 00000000000000000000000)).

The Problem

Since the solution of the afore (or in this case a two) mentioned quandaries (see end note 1), the multidimensionality of hyperdirectionalism has not been in doubt. However, the solutions found necessitated the recognition of the intersections of non-real relevances with linguistic phenomena such as certain things being "IN" and others being "FAR OUT". It should be noted at this point that these insestitial phenomenon were denied by traditional parallel thinkers. Since such denial is in the provence of psychology located in the Provence of Gaul, which accounts for the fact that such findings are galling to all left minded thinkers, it was hypothesized that an Anti-mathamatical solution would be totally inappropriate for appropriating contact with reality and therefore this was recognized as the natural inappropriate step to take in seeking the resolution of t he non-question.

Literature Review

(For complete appreciation the reader is encouraged to either A) play a tape, CD, or record of Susa marches, of B) Sing the Stars and Stripes Foreverat the top of his/her lungs paying special attention to the picallo line at the break) Please note that all are required to stand and salute each piece of literature as is passes by. The hand salute MUST be held until all possible pieces of literature have passed (see End note 2)

Attention!
Hand Salute!

Continuation of Dissertation

That was a very moving. To plagerize from Dr. Val Macy's A Theory to Explain the Groorg Phenomenon (1996) replace[d] the value of W with the values of today's Republican party and the cartesean substrate a recursive zero-point field is created[. B]y plotting the timebased projections of GROORG's propagation as said super hyperbolic asymtotic vector (SHAV) encounters the fifth node. In this research I have attempted to apply this paradigm (which is only worth $.20 at face value) to the issue of what is the IN thing. The subsequent transformation being rotated through the varimax method yielded a totally un expected finding. These findings indicated taht that voice of a god when spoken in a black hole forced an inversion of the singularity such that the speed of sound exceeded it self by a factor which can be expressed by the following equation: (see endnote 3): Infinity raised to sum of the length of the miniskirt over the total mass thereof after translation around the ! Qq2minus 17 axis on alternate tuesdays which start with W.

Thus it becomes apparent that this is the quivalent of Cawlfield's findings (Topher Cawlfield, March 19, 1996. The Escape Velocity of the Earth) where he notes " It should be obvious that the speed of an earthquake, dropped from an infinite height, will equal the speed of sound in a black hole." He goes on to note, in an equation not unlike the one not cited in Dr. Val Macy's A Theory to Explain the Groorg Phenomenon (1996), that "By reasoning backwards and a little to the left, we find that the escape velocity of the Earth from itself is equal to the speed of sound inside a black hole minus a toothpick."

The current findings corroborate the antithesis of both those of Val Macy and Cawlfield by indicating and measuring the toothpick. The major finding of significance, however, it that the resultant constant is a variable. This variable precisely describes how "way out" an item can be before the toothpick reaches critical mass to become a phallic symbol. Thus, it can be readily seen that these findings would be of uttermost (especially given their preoccupation with mammaries) interest to such agencies as the CIA, NSC, FBI, TRW,ABC, and CBS to name a butt (for those with T&A leanings) a few. A post hoc analysis of the data indicated the following: that the term perpendicular carried inherently in itself the solution to the issue as follows:

Perp: Diminuative form of perpetrator
en: The location of
dic: Male organ
u: The object frequently female
lar: Norwegien for toothpick

Reprints are available directly from the author himself at the location not listed. This thesis will self destruct un 5 seconds unless it doesn't Abandon all hope ye who enter here Candy is dandy but sex won't rot your teeth.

End Notes

1. Quandaries for those unfamiliar with the intricacies of biohistoricity are the ancient precursors of the dromadaries differing mainly in the lack of four humps as sex was not discovered at that time.

2. Literature is defined as anything external to the human, texan or alien unconcious which has the potential of being converted to a different media at any point in time.

3. Since this terminal is equipped with complete symbol and mathematical nomenclature, In the spirit of perpendicular dichotomy I will use english instead.